milk.

Milk.  It comes with a vengeance.  It's main opponent?  Your bras.  It's goal?  To ruin your life and maybe even chap your nipples.  I'll deal with it because it's rich in antibodies and other nutrients for my baby child... but mostly because it's free.  "Free" minus the ten dollar lanisol ointment and absorbent boobie pads.  

Speaking of boobie pads-

Hey Owen did your grizzly bear get a hat?
No? Just your mom's discarded absorbent milk pad?
Oh.

I guess I should put a trash can next to the rocker...